My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Randomize
