u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Do you still have your period?
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Randomize
