Just fell off a train. Bad.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I came so hard my ears popped.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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