using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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