1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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