i would punch a child for taco bell
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
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you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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