oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
