hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
