Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
