It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Randomize
