i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
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