Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Randomize
