Non-Jews are for practice
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
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