Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
