dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
And then he peed in my hair
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