party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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