I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
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