you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
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