You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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