If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
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