When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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