my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
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