you guys were way drunker than both of me
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
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