just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Randomize
