I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
