rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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