just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
