I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
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