can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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