Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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