idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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