I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Randomize
