There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
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She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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