I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
