I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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