And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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