God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize