Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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