i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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