If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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