I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Well I just put wine in my tea
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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