I just saw a hot homeless man
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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