i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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