Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
so much tequila, so little girl.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
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