Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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