Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I'm passing your future prison.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
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