did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize
