I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
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