I think I died a long time ago.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
