the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
